Friday, May 16, 2014

Slave Mythology: Limb Lopping 101: Limits vs. Limitations and Not Submitting to Twatwaffles

In the nearly 4 years that I've been on Fet, one of the most common conflicts is about limits, whether slaves can have them, and whether the no-limits slave exists. The main source of this conflict seems to be the lack of common definition of what the term "limits" means. Although, I'm sure you could make the argument that most conflicts on Fet are a result of conflicting definitions of the same term.

I <3 Photoshop. 

Those who claim to be no-limits slaves (well, most of them) appear to make the distinction between imposed limits and human physical and mental limitations. Those who claim all people have limits generally do not.

For the purposes of this writing, an imposed limit is defined as something one might be physically or mentally capable of doing or enduring, but dislikes it or fears it to the point of being unwilling to do so. A limitation is something one is either physically or mentally incapable of doing or enduring.

Now, I am not what anyone would consider a no-limits slave. I am permitted limits and do have them. However, I have generally been in the camp of limits and limitations being covered under the same umbrella. I have rarely made the distinction between imposed limits and human limitations, mainly because most of my limits are psychological limitations.

But I can sympathize with those who do identify as no-limits slave when the ever-popular straw man arguments start coming out. The most popular by far is limb lopping. It never fails that in a limits discussion, that someone on the "all people have limits" side brings up amputation as proof that everyone does indeed have limits.

Okay, technically, if they are defining limits and limitations as a single entity, that is true. All people do have limitations of some sort. But, seriously, who the hell is going to become the slave of a person who wants to chop your arms off?

Hey, Babe, wanna be my slave?

-whispers- Psst! By the way, making limb lopping a limit isn't actually going to save you from getting your arm chopped off if that person is psycho enough to try it in a non-emergency situation. It's kind of like that criminals don't give a shit about gun laws thing. Psychos tend to not give a shit whether or not you have it on a limit list.

Even as a person with limits, I've never felt the need to make death and dismemberment part of my blacklist. If I felt that either of those things even needed stating, chances are, I'm not going to get to the point of a relationship with a man. Logic would also dictate that a master generally doesn't want to kill his slave, ya know? I mean, then you have a body to dispose of, those pesky potential murder charges, your house is dirty, there's no one to fetch your drink anymore, and, damn, now you gotta find a new one. Killing and maiming just isn't worth that little spark of psychotic sadism.

The process of getting to M/s and no-limits M/s is generally fairly involved. It's not instant potatoes and Easy Mac. There's usually a lengthy period of getting to know one's partner and ascertaining compatibility before that kind of control is exercised. I'm friends with a number of no-limits slaves on Fetlife and none of them ever said they were no-limits at the beginning of a relationship nor have they ever advised a noob to be so.

When shit's done smart, people actually figure out who they are getting into relationships with. And in some cases, people get to the point where imposed limits are not something they find necessary, either because they share the same limits with their masters, or they simply choose not to impose them. One would hope they haven't picked a nutbag.

So, if you acquire that look of indignant horror or snide condescension when someone says they are a no-limits slave, you should probably contemplate how you and they are defining the word "limits" before you decide to be an ass hat and threaten to cut off their nipple (Someone actually admitted to doing this while holding a knife to a chick's tit. Assault much?) or imply that they are mythological ponycorns living in the organ-harvesting caves of Candy Mountain.

Just a thought.


  1. "who the hell is going to become the slave of a person who wants to chop your arms off?"
    Exactly! I have often pondered how this point is so often overlooked...

    1. I'm one of those annoying people who lump limitations and imposed limits together, but even I find "death" as a hard limit to be just a wee bit ridiculous.

      Straw men. They're so straw-y. Thanks for the comment!